27.11.2023 (feels like death but)

I feel like death now but I know the only way to fix this, the only way to talk to you is again is by fixing my life first and by leaving u alone totally.

Sorry I understood this a little late.

but I get it.

I love u no matter what, n leaving u alone n being the best version of me is my only option now.

deep breath.

ga yau NSC. no one is gonna be the safe haven now. Ga yau NSC

im changing ga la, tho maybe not as lek as u.

jus now had intense talk with v again. spilled out a lot of thots i've held up these years. of cos also mentioned the efforts she made recently, like treating my parents better etc. so this dumb nsc reli needs this crazy lesson to change. u r always "right", tho in a sort of "cold blooded" way to anxiously attached nsc. this is what it is to be an adult right. stand up n face it la nsc. u can do it.